Cleaning house

Lately, I've been trying to learn how to make it more natural for me to keep my house clean. I've read a few books. Here are some of the skills that help:

1. De-clutter! This is the most important thing. If you have too much stuff in your home (especially if it's stuff you don't use), then it is incredibly difficult to keep your home/living space clean. Throw away or donate the things that you don't use.

2. Put things away when you're done using them. This seems to be such a given that in one of the books that I read, it wasn't even stated directly! I am struggling as to how do I teach my kids to do this, especially with things like their toys since they often play while I'm busy doing something else. If you have something that's worked for you, please share!

3. Have a place for everything. If you don't know where to put something, it will end up making your living place look bad, because it will end up every which-where: on the floor, the counter, the table, your desk. Find a place for it!

4. Have routines for cleaning the stuff that can't be helped. You know what I mean: dirty counters and floors, bathrooms, etc. I'm not exactly sure how to implement this yet, so I'm not putting the tip in boldface font.

Why does potty training have to be so disgusting: a rhetorical question

I mean, I know why potty training is disgusting. Pretty much anything that involves poop is going to be gross.

But while I'm so proud of my kid for gaining independence, I regret that he didn't ask for help before he used up most of the roll of toilet paper and tracked poop on the floor and bathroom rug that I just washed for the same reason yesterday. Not to mention that the toilet paper in the toilet wasn't going down because there was too much of it in there, and he wasn't even close to asking me for help when I came to investigate after the second flush.

I told him that next time he needs to use toilet paper or that he goes #2 that he should tell me and ask me to help him before it becomes a problem.

One day--one day, I will not have to clean up other people's bodily waste. Today is not that day (and it's not coming anytime soon, either!).

Positive thoughts on a messy home

The other day as I finally started washing my dirty pots and pans, I thought about how nice it would be if I were better at staying on top of the dishes; it would be so nice if there were one or two--or fewer--dishes in the sink at a time.

Then I thought, "But wait--what am I doing with my time instead?"

Here are some things that I'm doing with my time instead of folding the laundry, washing the dishes, or cleaning the clutter off of the floor:

-take care of my children
-play with my children
-relax and recharge my emotional stamina for my day-to-day responsibilities
-spend time with my husband
-read for pleasure
-read for instruction
-socialize
-family history research
-make food for my family
-practice the piano for my church calling
-write about my experiences and thoughts on my blog

It's a pretty good list, and I'm sure there are more things on there that I didn't think of. I'm not certain how much less time I'd have to spend on those things if I kept my house company-ready at all times, but I know it would be significantly less, especially with the lovable chaotic force of a three-year-old in my home. Also, isn't it more efficient to get everything done at once?

Don't get me wrong--if the house is too bad, then it has an effect on me. Because of that, I'm kind of a minimalist when it comes to having "things." That way, there aren't as many things in my house to mess it up and there aren't as many things to clean up when that time comes.

Anyway, I think it's overall better to have a little bit of clutter, clothes in the dryer for days at a time, and partially unpacked boxes sitting around than to feel guilty about doing things that enrich your life.

So this weekend--don't clean your house! Go have an adventure instead. Give yourself one more hour of me- or family-time and take care of the cleaning later.

How to help a new mother

One Thanksgiving break about a year before I graduated from college, one of my sisters gave birth to a little boy, and I went to her home to help her with her other kids and anything else she may need during her recovery from the birth. It was my first time doing something like that, and I was excited to help my sister.

While I was there, I helped with laundry, cooking, cleaning, and the older kids, but my sister still looked and acted frazzled. I felt like there was a lot more that I could have done, but I didn't know what.
______

Fast forward a few years, and with the birth of my second child, I'm reminded again of the things that I wish I'd known that first time that I tried to help a new mother. Hopefully, the things that I share can help someone preparing to help a new mother. And just to make everything clear--the people who helped me were amazing and so helpful! I wouldn't have been able to recover so quickly without them.

So, what is the best way to help out a new mom? Here are three things that I think are the most helpful to a new mother, in order of importance.

1. Make her SLEEP! Every new mom is sleep-deprived and should be taking naps throughout the day to make up for the time spent awake during nighttime feedings. As her helper, you should remind her to sleep and make sure she knows she has no responsibility to entertain you or visit with you during your stay. It seems like that should go without saying, but you do need to say it.

There are different ways to encourage naps depending on the mom. However, it's pretty obvious that if things need to get done around the house, the mom will get them done instead of sleeping. Therefore, it's great to have help with other kids or the household responsibilities. That leads to the next two points.

2. Help with household chores. I personally love it when people clean up for me, especially in the kitchen. I like to cook, so that's not so much of a big deal as long as I don't have to clean up afterward :). However, I know other women that enjoy cleaning and dislike cooking, so for those women it would be the opposite--help with cooking takes priority over  help with cleaning. Find out which household duties are the least and most enjoyable for the mom and go from there.

Remember the less-thought-of responsibilities of a mother, such as laundry, cleaning the bathrooms, and bathing the older kids. 

3. Help with the kids. Make sure they're fed, diapers are changed if they need it, that they have help going to the bathroom or washing their hands, and that they're well hydrated. Read books to them and/or play with them. Make sure the mom has time to spend with her older kids, too. I guarantee that if she doesn't have time or energy to spend with her older kids, she will miss them. It doesn't matter how difficult they may or may not be.

__________

That's it, folks! Again, encourage the mom to get extra sleep and not to feel guilty about sleeping all day if she needs to. That's the most important thing.

Levi's help

So, Levi is my favorite toddler in the whole wide world. Big surprise, right? Haha, well, I have good reason (besides the fact that he's my child)!

Levi is a very helpful kid. Before I get used to the particular way in which he helps me, sometimes it seems like he's just getting in the way, but in the end he's very helpful. For example, when we come home with groceries, he always wants to carry a bag even if it drags on the ground. "That's nice," you may think, but it gets better! Once we come inside and I set the groceries down, Levi starts taking groceries out of the bag--and puts them away! The cans and things go in a cabinet that he can reach, so he's most excited about those. If the food goes somewhere else, he gives it to me after taking it out of the bag. Then when at least one bag is empty, he balls up the bag and puts it under the sink with the rest of the plastic bags. I encourage him as much as I can and make sure that he knows how much I love that he is so helpful. I want this to last!

Chatting the Chores Away

Rachel and I are in the kitchen talking up a storm. She is washing the dishes; I am clearing the counters and floor in order to wipe and mop once she's done. I am happy. We are planning on tackling the bathroom if we have enough time.

What could be better than cleaning with a beloved sister? I have to leave for a few minutes to start the laundry. When I come back, Rachel tells me that she forgot how much she hates doing the dishes without someone to talk to or music to listen to. We laugh, I agree, and we get back to happily chatting away the chores.

Before we know it, the kitchen is clean and it's time for Rachel to go. It was so good to visit with her, and I suspect that she feels the same way I do--it's so much easier to justify taking time out of a busy schedule to chat if there's work to be done--even if it isn't your own work--while you talk.